We tend to be a society driven by the concept of “hustle” – the need to climb higher, make more money, and achieve professional success. Too often, though, the means to achieve those goals come at the expense of our bodies, mental health, and overall well-being. We can simply push too hard. That’s why the concept of self-care has become a popular topic lately. A quick Google search will point you to a long list of books, podcasts, documentaries, YouTube videos, and self-care experts, all of which will reveal the secret mantras and routines you need to employ in order to take care of yourself.
For business leaders who shoulder the responsibility and stress of entire teams and companies, practicing self-care is particularly important. We’ve all heard the saying, “You can’t pour from an empty cup.” If you’re not intentionally refilling yourself on a regular basis, you’ll inevitably run dry and be unable to perform and meet the monumental responsibilities you face. Practicing a healthy amount of self-care will make you a better and more effective leader.
Unfortunately, recognizing your needs and taking the time to tend to them is somehow misconstrued as a weakness. Leaders often feel they are too busy to reflect on their own needs. They feel they should be able to be strong and power through for the sake of their team. However, recognizing and tending to your own needs is not a weakness. It will make you a stronger and more compassionate leader for your team. If your team doesn’t see you value your own self-care, then what perception does it give them about your valuation of their own well-being? If you let your needs go unmet, then I assure you that you are not leading others to your full potential. As much as you may feel you should push through, exhausted leadership is often ineffective leadership.
I know, I know…you’re busy. I won’t let you off that easily, though. Regular self-care doesn’t have to equate to impossible-to-meet daily time investments. If you don’t have a lot of time or aren’t ready to embrace the concept of incense and meditation, that’s okay! There are still some powerful things you can do. Understand that self-care is entirely individual. The concept is all about recognizing YOUR needs. Here are some general self-care starter pointers:
TAKE BREAKS: If you think you don’t have the time for a break, then consider this: research has proven that taking even small breaks can increase motivation, prevent decision fatigue, increase memory and learning retention, and increase overall productivity! With that increased productivity, you might find that you have more time than you think! Breaks can encompass anything from taking a lengthy vacation to a five-minute step out for some fresh air. Take the effort to schedule some breaks into your day. Don’t wait for the opportunity to arise. It may not. Control your day and your time instead of letting it control you. Schedule a few regular breaks, and then, and this is important, take those breaks!
BE MINDFUL: You need to be mindful of your needs. Start each day by asking yourself what your current needs are, then answer yourself honestly. Don’t fall into the trap of confusing your needs with either your wants or your idea of what your needs should be. There are no right answers here. Contemplate your own individual needs and reflect on how you can fulfill them. Throughout your day, stay mindful. Live in the present and be aware of the situation around you. Stay focused. Being mindful will help you tend to your own needs and will make you a better, more compassionate leader overall. In a 2017 article published by the University of Colorado Law School, mindfulness is specifically linked to an improvement in lawyer decision-making, ethics, and leadership. To truly be mindful means that you should keep a flexible state of mind that is focused and sensitive to the present situation.
SET BOUNDARIES: Setting boundaries is a way of protecting your own needs. Defined boundaries can serve to protect the areas you decide are most important to you. Along with boundaries, you can set expectations for others. Once you know where you draw the line, you can make that clear to others, thus lessening the need to either continuously say “no” or get sucked into situations that do not gratify your needs. For example, if you decide that you function best when you eat a healthy lunch daily, you need to protect your ability to partake in a daily healthy mid-day meal. Set that boundary and block that time out on your calendar. Let others know that you are not available during that time each day. The consequence of not setting and protecting that boundary is that not only will you function at diminished capacity without your lunch break, but you will ultimately begin to resent individuals and activities causing the interference.
EAT WHOLE FOODS: I would be remiss if I didn’t mention at least once that self-care should include making good choices for yourself. Research has linked a healthy diet and regular exercise to better mental function and increased productivity. Specifically, the food we eat has a direct link to cognitive performance. A study published by the British Journal of Health Psychology concluded that consuming more fruits and vegetables increased engagement and creativity among participants. Eat what you like, but make smart choices. Self-care should include equal parts of doing and consuming the things that bring you joy and are good for you. A smart diet can offer a way of practicing good self-care that doesn’t require any additional time in your day.
MOVE YOUR BODY: Exercise is important for many reasons, one of which is that your body needs it to stay healthy and energized. Exercise has also been linked to improved mental health and overall wellbeing. Physical activity releases endorphins, reducing stress and improving mood. You don’t have to become a gym rat or train for a marathon (unless you want to!), but find physical activities that you enjoy, such as yoga, boxing, biking, walking, or hiking. It doesn’t have to be a huge time commitment or require a lot of expensive equipment. It just needs to be a practice that you’re able to do relatively consistently. Make it a part of your regular self-care routine to move your body and get those endorphins flowing.
CONNECT WITH OTHERS: As social beings, humans crave connection with others, but in our busy lives, creating and maintaining meaningful relationships can often fall by the wayside. I’ve found this is especially true for people in leadership positions. It can be lonely at the top. But making time for social connections is essential to self-care. Schedule regular catch-ups with friends or family, join a club or group that shares your interests, and make an effort to reconnect with old acquaintances. These vital social interactions can be a great source of support, stress relief, and enjoyment. Too, they can provide space away from work to allow you to disconnect and be present.
ENGAGE IN ACTIVITIES THAT BRING YOU JOY: A common misconception I often hear people convey about self-care practices is that they take too much time. I understand time is a precious commodity. Self-care doesn’t have to mean adding more tasks to your already busy day. You can practice self-care by engaging in activities that bring you joy and help you unwind from everyday stressors. This could include anything from watching your favorite TV show, reading a book, playing a musical instrument, or taking a bubble bath. Whatever it is that brings you happiness and relaxation, make time for it regularly as a form of self-care. Remember, self-care is about prioritizing your own needs and well-being, so don’t feel guilty for taking time to do the things that make you happy.
GET ENOUGH REST AND SLEEP: This is a big one for law firm leaders! Often in my work with firm owners and leaders, I hear complaints about major sleep deficits. You’re the first in the office and the last to leave. And when you get home, you’re still connected (thanks, Smartphones!) and your working hours get longer and longer and longer with each passing year. In our fast-paced society, getting enough rest can often be overlooked in favor of productivity and success. But it’s truly a non-negotiable! Getting proper rest and sleep is essential for both physical and mental health. Make sure to prioritize getting 7-9 hours of sleep each night and create a relaxing bedtime routine to help you wind down from the day. Seriously, don’t underestimate the power of sleep and rest. Your body and mind both need it!
SET A GOOD EXAMPLE FOR YOUR TEAM: As I mentioned earlier, practicing a reasonable amount of self-care should not be perceived as a weakness by your team. Quite the contrary when approached thoughtfully! It can and should set a good example for the people around you. Your team needs to know you value well-being, both yours and theirs. Creating a workplace culture that includes and promotes both emotional and physical well-being will ultimately lead to increased performance of your team. That culture starts at the top. As a leader, it is your job to set that culture. Set the example from the top that recognizing and protecting your needs is a crucial element of strong performance. Allow your team to practice self-care and expect high performance in return. Part of being a great leader is having high expectations: high expectations of yourself and your team. Therefore, keep those expectations high, but consider self-care to be a tool you and your team need to practice in order to live up to those high expectations.
Don’t shrug off self-care as nonsense or a momentary fad. It’s not. Loads of scientific research back the practice of self-care and the benefits it provides. As leaders, it’s when we learn to manage our whole selves better that we become capable of true leadership. We can’t get there without putting in the work in every area of our lives. Once you begin your self-care journey, you may just find that taking care of yourself means you can take care of everything else. So, start today! Make a commitment to consider your own needs on a regular basis and practice self-care as part of your daily routine. Your mind, body, and team will thank you for it. Enjoy the journey!
